Thursday, September 2, 2010

Hon, I think we have scared the carpool kids...

This year, we are carpooling with a new family. A family new to school that also lives in our neighborhood. Wonderful. Carpooling is my friend. 

Just not so much in the morning. When I have to concern myself with getting someone ELSE'S child to school on time. No, in the mornings, carpooling can turn me into the meanest of drill sergeants: "FIVE MINUTE WARNING!!! THE BUS LEAVES IN FIVE MINUTES! TEETH BRUSHED, SHOES ON, BACKPACKS READY TO GO! FIVE MINUTES!"

But after a few weeks of getting used to it, I think the girls are getting the hang of the morning routine. I mean, today, it only took them FIFTY (as in 5-0) minutes to get themselves dressed, their beds made and their teeth cleaned. I think that's pretty damn good considering they ALSO have to brush their dolls' hair, get THEM dressed, sing a few good ol' Justin Bieber songs to get the day started, put some nailpolish on and so forth. 

Yup, 50 minutes it took them this morning. 

So things are DEFINITELY looking up. 

But I digress. Back to the carpool kids. 

Four kids does NOT equal a quiet car. Add to that two ADDITIONAL kids, who seem, at least compared to mine, very sweet, quiet, mindful children, and you have ONE CHAOTIC, OBNOXIOUSLY loud car. 

I can't hear myself think. I sure can't hear anyone else clearly. And I have been known to have to stop the car because one of my children (who will remain nameless, but who is 4-AND-A-HALF and a pain in my rear) decided it was not only appropriate, but hysterical, to SPIT on another one of my children. 

Of course, I didn't KNOW this is why she was screaming. I just had to stop the car. The day prior, I had to pull over because the same above-mentioned child belted out his OWN blood-curdling scream because he saw a BUG in the car. So he thought it appropriate to scream, kick my chair and high tail it to the BACK of the mama van, completely flustered and unbuckled. 

Good God, I hope SRS doesn't routinely read blogs.

So these poor, poor kids (the carpool kids, not mine) must think we are all crazy. They must go home and tell some REAL stories to their parents. 

Maybe that's why, when I dropped them off today, the mom came out of the house and met me at the car. Maybe she was checking to be sure there wasn't anything seriously WRONG with me or my kids. Maybe she thinks I'm doing drugs while driving. Or drinking. Or both. 

Maybe I should start.

Ahh well. I hope the carpooling lasts. Maybe these poor kids will get used to my crazy kids and their loud, piercing chatter - one trying to talk above the other who is trying to talk above the other. 

Sad thing is, this is all normal to me. You have 4 kids, you get used to not being able to think a clear thought until they are all in bed. And even then, when you think all is calm...that's RIGHT when the same above-mentioned child scurries downstairs to YOUR side of the bed (of course) to tell you that he has a question....

"What is your question???? IT IS 230am!!!"
" does the morning take so long to get here?"

But THAT, ladies and gentlemen, is a blog post for another day!

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Tracey's bookshelf: read

The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo
The Girl Who Played with Fire
The Girl Who Kicked the Hornet's Nest
My Sister's Keeper
Nineteen Minutes
The Pact
The Tenth Circle
Change of Heart
Keeping Faith
Handle with Care
House Rules
More Than It Hurts You
Amy and Isabelle
A Prayer for Owen Meany
A Widow for One Year
The 158-Pound Marriage
To the Lighthouse
Between the Acts
A Room of One's Own, and Three Guineas
The Help

Tracey English's favorite books »