Tuesday, April 6, 2010

Dear Dad,

So, today marks six years since you have been gone. There are so many things that I wish I could say to you, one on one, sitting in the same room while watching the kids play. I do find comfort knowing that you are looking down on us. We talk to you often, Abby, Keely and I.

Oh yes, they ask a lot of questions. Abby remembers. Keely, not so much, but we tell her stories.

And now, as you know, we have added Connor, and most recently, Libby, to our family. What blessings they are. Connor, I know, would share your love of trains. I wish you could take him to the train museum, just you and him, and tell him all about them. And imagine if you and he could board those real trains that you loved so much. He would have a ball. Truly.

Libby is so much like Kee that it's crazy. I vividly remember that day at the beach, just a few years back, when you held Keely so close outside on the deck. You looked so happy with her. She was so happy being held by you. Libby is the same way. You would adore her, dad. I so wish you could hold her.

Abby and Keely are growing so fast. Sometimes I swear, I blink and they grow older right before my eyes. They have wonderful memories that you began with them. For those, I will be forever grateful.

Just wanted to take a moment to say hi. I think of you often - when I'm sitting outside and enjoying some beautiful spring weather, when the classical music plays in the house, when the clouds open up ever so slightly to allow the sun to peek through and rays of sunshine are everywhere. You are too.

Abby says that when the sky is like that, she feels that God is talking to her.
I agree, but I also think you are talking to us!

I love you, dad. I miss you.


maura said...

wonderful post, Tracey. Dad continues to live in all of us, in the stories we tell about him and in the faces of your kids.

i feel so fortunate that i was at a point in my life where i could spend those last 2 months helping Mom take care of him and be with him.

remember our crazy drive to Houston at the end of January with Keely and Ben in my little civic hatchback?! remember the crazy snow and rain? what a drive that was!

difficult as it was, i wouldn't trade any of it for the world. :) xo

TLCinKs said...

Thank you so much for sharing your memories of your dad. It is so touching and such an inspiration for me to cherise the times I have with dad.

Sending you a big hug on this day!
Teresa Clounch

Tracey's bookshelf: read

The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo
The Girl Who Played with Fire
The Girl Who Kicked the Hornet's Nest
My Sister's Keeper
Nineteen Minutes
The Pact
The Tenth Circle
Change of Heart
Keeping Faith
Handle with Care
House Rules
More Than It Hurts You
Amy and Isabelle
A Prayer for Owen Meany
A Widow for One Year
The 158-Pound Marriage
To the Lighthouse
Between the Acts
A Room of One's Own, and Three Guineas
The Help

Tracey English's favorite books »